do u ever flirt w/ someone and ur just like “haha oh my god id fuckin WRECK u”
*sprawls out seductively on your bed* *reaches into my pants* *pulls out my cellphone* what’s ur wifi password
This Misleading Moriarty memes are definitely my Valentine cards this year.
I’m not even sorry.
I can’t breathe.
oh my god mom why are u getting mad? i was just trying to offer u some of this dank ass weed
IF SOMEONE IS SCARED OF SPIDERS OR BUGS DONT FUCKING PICK ONE UP AND WALK TOWARDS THEM WITH IT YOU ARENT FUCKING FUNNY YOU’RE A GODDAMN ASSHOLE